i realized something a while ago and i think everybody knows it...
this world is FILLED with people trying to take adventage of you and your weaknesses.
As harsh as it may seem absolutely NOTHING is innocent.
every word we say...
every thing we do has a hidden purpose behind it.
Nobody helps someone for no reason...and the people who DO are laughed at and used instead of being admired...
where has our world gone?why is it like that?...i d really like to know what satisfaction do people have from being mean rude and impolite to others?
being nice is so much easier(well at least for me)
BUT that s why people have laughed at me and treated me badly when i was younger...=/
i don t know what to think anymore...should we be mean to be respected or just be ouselves and get walked all over by others?
i don t know...

because of others i have changed:both negatively and positively.
i ve learned to stand up for myself BUT sometimes hurt people to protect myself... i don t like it...but what else can i do i ve been hurt too many times )=

and as i have mentally changed i ve also changed my way of being:
i used to stay in my corner and not talk whereas now i find going to others and talking to them much easier
so what other have done to me( = laughed at me and made me feel horrible) can be concidered as "sort of" good cuz it has enabled me to become more confident?...
i dont know...
in a way yes because i like who i am now very much...but no because i miis my old self...
i really do...
(this way i saw things,my ability to trust others,to help others just because i wanted to be nice to them)
well...maybe it s what people call groing and becoming an aduld?


...i don t wanna grow up


what do you guys think?